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“I miss her so damn much. I’d almost forgotten what she looked like.” I let the tears drip unfettered down my cheeks as I glanced over at Tash. “I never thought I’d get to see her face again.”
“Well, you have the pictures now, but if you ever forget again…” she pushed my hair back behind my ears. “Just go look in the mirror. With the exception of your eyes, you are your mother’s daughter.” That managed to make me feel a little better. It was one thing for my dad to keep saying that, but for someone else to see her pictures and agree meant a lot.
Chapter 4
I woke up with swollen, sand-papery eyes that I knew had to be shot through with red lines and underscored with enough luggage to make a travel store envious.
A knock sounded on my door. Not that I hadn’t been expecting it since the sun must have come up hours ago. “Yeah?” I called out as I rolled out of bed, tucked my mother’s photo album into my unused nightstand drawer, and flailed around until my new replacement phone was glaringly displaying the late hour in my face.
“Hey, just wanted to bring you some coffee,” Tash smiled as she pushed an extra large steaming cup from the coffee shop down the street towards me. I knew from the smell that she’d gone the extra step and gotten me my favorite guilty pleasure, blueberry mocha. Don’t knock it until you try it. It’s a sweet burst of caffeine-filled goodness. It was definitely one that I desperately needed at the moment. Keys was right behind her with a familiar pastry box in hand too.
“Have I told you guys lately how much I love you?” I smiled up at them.
Legs followed in behind them, took one look at me, and moved straight into my ensuite bathroom. “Angel Girl,” she called out from behind the door. “I’m going to fix your face, you’re going to drink that coffee, eat some of that processed sugar crap Keys brought you, and then you have someone waiting downstairs to talk to you.”
“I’m really not up for guests today.” I sipped at the coffee eyeing the two women who were still in the same room with me suspiciously.
Tash threw her hands up in the air in surrender. “I had nothing to do with it.”
“Nothing to do with what, exactly?”
“Um,” Keys started. “I ran into Quickshot at the bakery, and he begged me to let him come back and speak to you. He said it wasn’t fair that he had already been punished for seven years for shit he didn’t even know about. He misses you. I might have felt bad for him, and let him follow me back.”
I heaved out a sigh before snatching the box of baked goodness out of her hands. There were three Danish pastries in there that I happened to know from experience would melt in the mouth of the person lucky enough to consume them. I squinted my eyes at Keys, “I take it there’s one for each of us?”
“Well, yeah, except for Legs, because you know she doesn’t eat,” she threw her fingers up in air quotes before finishing. “That sugar shit.”
I rolled my eyes. “I should eat yours since you don’t know how to go out without picking up strays.” Tash snickered as she reached in and snagged her pastry before I could lay claim to that one too.
“You’re just greedy,” Keys pouted.
Legs came back into the room with a bunch of products I wasn’t even aware of owning and a washcloth that had been run under water and rung out. “It’s not icy cold, but it should do to help reduce the swelling on the fly.” She plopped the cloth over my eyes and told me to hold it tight. I did. I also blindly rooted around the pastry box for my cheesy, Danish goodness. “Mmm,” I managed to moan out while Legs tsked her disapproval. “You’ll have to hit the gym extra hard with me later to make up for that,” she chided.
“I don’t have to make up for anything. This is perfection, right here.” The other girls snickered out laughs as Legs lifted the cloth off my face. She then proceeded to make me over with enough makeup to hide the fact that I’d cried my eyes out last night, but with so much skill that it looked like I barely had anything on. The minimalist style was my usual thing, so I thanked her for it as I stared into her coal-rimmed baby blues.
“Bring Quick up,” I said to Keys then. “I’d rather not have any more meetings, personal or business, around the other girls until they learn their damn place here. That shit last night was unacceptable.”
“It’s being dealt with, don’t worry,” Legs assured me. “Those girls are either going to get pissed and leave or they’re going to be in the best shape of their lives when I’m done with them.”
I turned to Tash as Keys left to go get Quickshot from downstairs. “What all did they manage to overhear last night?”
She winced outwardly, which told me most of what I needed to know. “They heard damn near everything.” Tash shook her head back and forth a bit. “That ditz, Jesa, was so enraptured with your story she didn’t even bother saying anything. She just stood there listening like it was some late night Telenovela for her entertainment.”
“Damn, and they all just stood there and let me spill my guts? Assholes.”
“Don’t be so hasty with the judgment, sis.” Quickshot was in the doorway. “Normally, I would have clued you in, but I was kind of curious myself about why you went off the rails, and into hiding for seven damn years. From me.”
“I wasn’t hiding from you, but you’re a member of his club. I, of all people, know the club comes first. If he asked where I was and you knew, you’d have to tell him.”
Quickshot’s frown was just as telling as his silence, and he knew what I said was true. “You could have at least called, sent a letter, something saying you were okay. Hell, for the past five years half the club assumed you were dead somewhere.”
It was my turn to frown now.
Quickshot continued on. “For the first two years, everyone just thought you were being a stubborn ass about the marriage thing. They tormented the shit out of Sweet too. Talked about how he couldn’t keep a woman satisfied, how he ran you off with his bad performance. They seriously thought you’d been with him or something, and just got scared away. I mean, I thought you were okay with everything too for a while there, and then you were just gone.”
“Quick…” I started pleadingly.
“No, I get it. I heard everything you had to say last night. Fuck, Jamie, why didn’t you come to me? Why didn’t you say something? Anything? I would have…”
“You would have what? Gone up against my dad’s wishes? No, you wouldn’t have, Wallace!” I all but yelled the words at him, because that was precisely why I’d simply run in the first place. I knew no one could have my back against my dad.
“Damn it, Jamie. First, let’s get this straight. I would have beat the ever loving shit out of Sweet for pulling that crap with Marisol had I known about it when it happened.” He glared down at me, and then his eyes softened. “For the record, last night when I was punching the shit out of him, he claimed it was all bullshit.”
“You hit him?” I gawked. I hadn’t expected that. There was a rank structure you didn’t mess with in the MC. Sure, fights broke out from time to time with too much testosterone flying around, but a blatant attack on a ranking member was a punishable offense.
“OF COURSE I fucking hit him!” His statement started out a yell until he saw me flinch back. “Seven fucking years, Jamie! This bullshit stole seven years from us that we should have spent together laughing and enjoying life, just like the first 18.” He ran his hand over the spiked tips of his blond hair. “Jesus. I can’t even begin to tell you everything you’ve missed about me, and I have no clue what all I’ve lost out on with you. I mean look at all of this.” He flipped his arms up in the air and spun around. “You did this. You ran out, and fucking made your own damn life.” Then his smile grew wide. “Hell, Jamie, for all you know I have a wife and kid now.” My eyes flashed wide, and immediately dropped to his ring finger. “I mean, I don’t.” He chuckled. “But I could have. Ouch!” He wasn’t quick enough to duck the romance novel I tossed at his head from my nightstand. He did manage to bend down, pick it
up, and snicker at the bare-chested man on the cover. “So, this is how you fill all the lonely nights, huh, Jamsters?”
“Ugh,” I groaned out. “One of the girls gave it to me.” So not true. I had them lying around all over the place. The girls often borrowed them from me. It was an unhealthy addiction. I enjoyed romance. I hadn’t been lying to the girls when I said that my Aunt Kiki’s relationship was the one I based my hopes off of, and damn if her love story couldn’t have been written on the pages of any book and been a bestseller.
“Sure,” he muttered before he sat on the edge of my bed with me. It was the first time I realized the girls had made themselves scarce. “I’m so sorry, Jamie.” His voice was low and apologetic. “You never should have felt like you couldn’t come to me for help. I would have helped you. Hell, even if it had cost me my kutte, I would have helped you.”
“Wallace,” I muttered as I lay my head on his shoulder. “I didn’t want my problems to cost you anything.”
“They did though.” I turned my face up to look him in the eye. “They cost me you. For too damn long, they cost me you.”
“I’m sorry,” I whispered as I looked away. “I missed you like crazy.”
“Missed you, too, Jamie.” His arm shot around me and pulled me into a tight little side-hug.
“Missed me so much you took it out on the weights, huh?” I pulled back enough to reach up and try to grab around his bicep. That was so not happening. His arms were thicker than my damn thighs, and that was saying something. “Jesus, do you go all hulk-smash on people now, or what?” Quickshot just laughed at me, and then gave me a serious looking over. He reached over and squeezed my bicep.
“I don’t know; you look like you work out a pretty good bit these days too, Jamie.”
“Yeah, Legs keeps us all healthy and up to date on the latest self defense moves.”
Quickshot’s brow shot up. “Legs?” He thought for a minute. “The blond model looking chick?”
I smirked. “That would be the one.”
“She’s a fighter?” He all but scoffed at his own question.
“Mmhmm. She’s badass. Sure, she looks high maintenance, but she’s not afraid to get bruised while dropping an ass whoopin’ on some deserving jerk. You better watch it, or I’ll sic her on you.”
“Whatever!” He laughed.
“I’ll invite you over one day when we’re having our sparring and training sessions. I wouldn’t start underestimating any of the women here if I were you. A few of them have been to hell and back, and they’re doing whatever it takes to ensure that shit never happens again.”
Quickshot’s easy smile dropped off his face then. “Jamie, have you been okay?”
“I’ve never been beaten or abused by anyone if that’s what you’re asking. I have my own demons, but they’re just that, ones of my own making.”
He nodded then and I suppose he decided it was better not to delve further, which was just fine by me, because I wasn’t ready to share. “What do you say we get out of here for a bit, and you show me around this little pissant town you’re calling home these days.”
I laughed, because he wasn’t kidding. We lived on the outskirts of a tiny little town that could barely be considered a town on most people’s radars, but it was just what we needed. Quaint, cozy, out of the way, yet centrally located. “Sure, can you go wait downstairs while I get something else on though? I kinda slept in this shit last night.” I tugged at my wrinkled all to hell top. Quickshot smiled while standing, and quickly made his way out the door.
After showing Quickshot around our town of Sierra High, Georgia, and then some of the nearby larger towns, we finally made our way back to the clubhouse. “Ghost texted me while we were out. He has to head back home in a couple days. He’d like to be able to come by and talk to you. I think some of it’s probably personal, but he has business to discuss too.” Quickshot didn’t exactly look happy to be stuck as the go-between for this situation so I figured I would let him off the hook easily.
“Fine. We’re having a party tomorrow night. Nothing major, just a low-key celebration for our girl, MiMi’s birthday. You guys can come as long as everyone is on good behavior. Remind those assholes that my girls are not club whores. They’re more than welcome to hook up if they choose to, but they aren’t here for anyone’s entertainment.”
Quickshot nodded, leaned in and kissed me on my forehead and then said his goodnights before leaving. I heard a sigh from behind me as I watched Quick take off. Keys was standing there over my shoulder when I turned around.
“What’s up?”
“Just enjoying the view,” she grinned.
“Ah, hell. You crushin’ on my big brother, Keys?”
“Can you blame me? He’s so pretty to look at. Besides, if he’s been your friend all these years, he can’t be a bad guy.”
“Doesn’t mean he’s a good guy when it comes to other women though, Keys.” I raised my eyebrows out her. “Fair warning and all.”
Keys tossed her hands in the air with a huff. “I get it. I know how those badass biker boys are. They have tits and ass at their beck and call.” She rolled her eyes. “Doesn’t mean he wouldn’t make for a fun ride while he’s in town,” she giggled out.
I stuck my fingers in my ears. “La, la, la, la I cannot unhear that shit, Keys. Damn it, what part of ‘big brother’ did you not understand? We may not be biological, but I don’t need to think about him sticking it to one of my friends. Ugh.”
The following evening, our birthday celebration for MiMi was officially crashed by a handful of guys from Aces High MC. I recognized a couple more guys from the Cedar Falls Chapter that my dad was president of, as well as some of the guys from the new local chapter too. I didn’t want to seem too eager to speak to any of them, other than Quickshot, so when they showed up I hightailed it up to the loft. I stood there in the shadows for quite a long time simply taking in all the interactions happening in our bar and lounge area below.
Watching him circulate through the people gathered in my clubhouse from the shadows of the loft couldn’t be considered too creepy could it? It was like doing my research, a stakeout, or something. Actually it could more accurately be described as torture. Seeing Sweet offer up an easy smile, cocky grin, or genuine laugh to so many of the women from my club, not to mention their friends, was not a fun thing to endure. When he put his hand on the small of their back, touched a shoulder, leaned in to better hear them, or whisper something in their ears just added insult to injury. You would think none of it would affect me anymore. I’d moved on to other guys over the years. I guess it’s true what they say though. You never really get over your first love, crush, whatever, even if they were also the ultimate disappointment.
“You gonna creep around up here all night?” Keys asked me. I knew she had made her way up to the loft moments ago. There was no missing her bright red hair, even from my peripheral vision.
“Seems to be less drama and more peace up here. Besides, I’m learning a lot.”
“How many women has he put his hands on?”
“Six,” I answered quickly without thinking. Damn it. That had been a trap of a question, and I walked right into it. I nodded downstairs. “Make that seven.”
“Ghost has been asking to speak with you. He says he has to head out, possibly as early as tomorrow morning to handle club business that popped up in his absence.”
“Honestly, I’m not sure I’m ready to speak to my father.”
“What’s the big worry?”
“I guess that he’ll try to offer excuses for everything instead of owning up to the horrible shit he pulled.”
“The great thing about this being your place is that if you’re not hearing what you want, you don’t have to put up with it. Plus, you have a room full of women at your back.”
“Look at them,” I nodded down at the women from our club who were fawning all over Sweet, Quickshot, and the other guys. Hell, there were a couple chatting up my dad. Keys lo
oked almost as disgusted as I did. “I often wonder if the guys’ level of violence and hazing of new members isn’t the better way to go. Those bitches would jump all over that shit in a hot minute if they didn’t think one of us was watching them.”
“You’re right on both counts. What are we going to do about them though?”
“The ones who don’t actively work for one of our companies need to be put through a better vetting process. I’m not sure just what yet, but we can’t afford to have non-loyal women hanging about.”
“Agreed. I’ll get Legs to help come up with something. Probably get JoJo in on it too. She’s been a bit off lately. Think it will help to have a distraction.” Keys smiled over at me. “Does it bother you?” She nodded down where Sweet was touching another woman as he leaned in to her. This time I saw him repeat the same gesture he did with most of them. Hand in pocket, remove hand, place it near shoulder or lower back, swipe on women as if wiping his hand…
“Keys,” I stood up straighter, eyes narrowed on the scene below me. “Get a scanner out there and swipe it over Jesamine, Ashley, MiMi, Chris, and whoever that girl is he’s standing with now.” Her eyes were wide at my suggestion.
“You think he’s bugging people?”
I shrugged. “Same motions with each girl in the beginning, like he’s pulling something from his pocket and wiping it on their clothing. I’d rather have them checked to be sure before the ones that know anything start spilling secrets.”
Keys nodded and headed for the stairwell. “Go ahead and send Ghost up too, please.”